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of course I’m tacky, stupid

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There was this time in high school where I posse’d up with a bunch of pals, got terribly drunk and went to a haunted house. The line was really long and it was bitter cold, both of which are conducive to taking a piss (at least in my humble case). I just couldn’t hold it, so I headed for the port-a-john. This particular port-a-john had a lid over the opening, which I have never heard of before or since, and I was blissfully unaware of this. So, in my pleasant inebriated fashion, I sat and began the whizzing function before all facts registered clearly.

I pissed all over the lid. D’OH!!!

The really hilarious part, though, is the fact that I simply didn’t care. I was really fucking amused. So much so that I loudly told my friends when I got back into line. I STILL find it hilarious.

I have no idea why that particular story came to me on this particular day. Perhaps the fact that it is raining relentlessly and it is cold. I dunno.


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